


Tilted World

by Nihonkikuasa211



Category: Code Black (TV)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Interlude Between Seasons, Memories, Missing Christa, Missing Neal, POV Multiple
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-24
Updated: 2016-08-24
Packaged: 2018-08-10 20:52:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7860694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nihonkikuasa211/pseuds/Nihonkikuasa211
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It came suddenly, sometimes. Remembering, and forgetting in between.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tilted World

_Titled World_

 

              It came suddenly sometimes. Remembering, and forgetting in between. There would be a flash of blond hair, and Malaya would be painfully reminded of Christa. She would easily remember of how the resident would always be certain to remember the patient’s name, and of how kind she was. It was in Trauma One that Malaya remembered of how Neal would always be certain to teach them, instruct them on what his gentle and sure hands were doing. The looks that would pass between the resident and attending even before they had gotten together, and when they had pulled away from each other. The small smile that Christa gave to her, a slight tilt to her lips as the younger resident beamed back. She remembered so much about the two people who touched her heart.

Of how it had felt to be embraced by the dark attending, his touch gentle and loving as she had lied in the hospital bed, beaten. Somehow during their absence, Malaya began to forget things. She couldn’t remember of the first conversation she had with the older resident, or of what Neal had exactly said about his vague references to his British mother. Malaya had almost risked exposing her joy when she heard a familiar accent – but it was not Neal. A patient with sun-kissed hair and green eyes was screaming for a doctor – his words reminiscent of Neal’s somewhat, remembering the time when the attending had confused his British words with American ones. Malaya had forgotten about her friends then as the unnamed patient with a British accent was stabilized. Even as she thought of the blond resident who secretly disliked sweets and the attending who had secretly liked Indian food despite his parents’ preference, Malaya couldn’t remember the exact words they had shared.

 

* * *

         It came sudden, sometimes. Remembering, and forgetting in between. Angus hadn’t realized the hell he would be going through. Perhaps it would have been better to stick with Adderall, the sullen resident had thought at the news that Dr. Hudson and Christa were leaving. He quickly banished the thought away, not wanting to imagine seeing the anger and disappointment in Mario’s eyes. This time, when Mike had said that Dr. Hudson – or Neal, as his older brother called him – and Christa were leaving, there was a serious tone in Mike’s eyes that Angus hadn’t seen when he said Dr. Rorish was leaving. Angus had watched as Mike leaned over to his old friend and whispered into his ear. Angus had only heard about his brother’s friends in passing – a comment there and a maybe a brief synopsis of the kind of tomfoolery they had been up to as a med student or a resident in Angels. But Mike had never truly imaged that Neal was that close to his brother – knowing each other since Neal had arrived from England. Angus couldn’t imagine the humiliation the young Dr. Hudson had suffered under the iron gaze of Dr. Rorish – his was bad enough. Not knowing very much emergency medicine, and leaving your home country without knowing anyone…Angus couldn’t imagine it. There were times when he was grateful for Dr. Hudson’s way of teaching. If Dr. Rorish was the unyielding father, then Dr. Hudson was the caring older brother who would guide you into the storm. He had parted words advice to the residents, some of which still stuck with Angus. And then Christa. She was a person that his father would scorn – and that made her seem more likable in his eyes. She was a very good physician, and Angus remembered of how close she had been to Dr. Rorish, and then to Dr. Hudson. She was older than them, and had been through so much although Angus didn’t know the details, and she still was the most empathic and sensitive. Her smile had the ability to make anyone happy, especially Dr. Hudson. There were times when Angus forgot certain things about the two people that had – in his eyes – had briefly run away to only find each other again – made him feel like he belonged. Their mannerisms, and the what they had said when he had conversations with them. Angus remembered this though. Both Christa and Neal treated him seriously – not with disbelief like his father, or barely concealed scorn in the beginning with Mario, or of the calm certainty of Malaya. Those two believed that he could be the best doctor he could be without saying a word.

              And Angus was grateful for that memory, even as the others faded in his mind.

 

* * *

 

              It came sudden sometimes. The remembering, and forgetting in between. Mario hadn’t meant to compare at first. He didn’t know of why he had gotten attached to the two people who were no longer here, but he did. If Mario had known Christa would leave before her first year of residency was completed, he would have been _less_ of an ass to her. He would have treated her as the older sister Mario had eventually seen her as. Perhaps if he had known that Dr. Hudson, or Neal, would go to the Northeast, he wouldn’t have made a fool of himself on the erectile dysfunction case. But then he wouldn’t have gotten to hear the words of wisdom that Mario hadn’t forgotten. Mario would remember the time when he had thought that he would get kicked out of the program because he had picked up a patient’s son when he was supposed to at Angels – and instead of not saying anything, or telling a very good lie, Mario had told his mentor the truth. The anger in Dr. Hudson’s voice had faded by the time he had spoken with him, _slightly_. Perhaps that was how the British acted pleased when someone did something against the rules. They had a good laugh one time at Angus’ and Malaya’s reaction to the “cold” California weather. To them, running in sixty-degree weather in March was heaven, with snow still melting on the ground. It was during that time that Mario truly began to care about them – the sound of Christa’s laughter, and of how Neal would often smile at her with his dark brown eyes.

              Mario tried to not compare. But it was hard. The first year resident Charlotte, was getting on his nerves. Never had he imagined would he have to deal with her telling him of how difficult it was for her peers to acknowledge her _so many times_ , and wanting to rest – preferably bang, but Angus was having an effect on him – his head against the wall. She was not kind, like Christa. She stated her mind whatever she thought, even it was rude. Perhaps she thought that getting high marks and being a child star was an award, for she kept on mentioning it until Mario could recite it word by word. Then she had asked about Christa. _“Who’s this Christa person you three keep talking about?”_ The resident looked pointedly at him, a question burning in her eyes. Mario had sighed and thought about how to answer. His first mistake was to tell Charlotte that Christa was a stay-at-home-mom before she became a doctor. There was a raised eyebrow, and Mario fought the urge to hold his anger in check. _How is a child star any better?_ The second-year resident had wanted to snap. But he had said nothing. Instead, he told the girl that she would better look for information on _Dr. Lorenson_ elsewhere, because he wasn’t going to say anything. The other guy Mario didn’t like either. Sure, he taught them combat medicine – but he didn’t have the calm instruction of Dr. Hudson. He was more like Dr. Rorish. Half of the time Mario wondered if anything that came out of his mouth was a compliment or a critique. Mario had almost, _almost_ lost it when he heard Campbell talking about Dr. Hudson mockingly, calling him a coward for running away from both his profession and a broken heart. It had taken every ounce of Mario’s self-control to walk away. Because he knew that Dr. Hudson and Christa would not like him hitting Campbell despite the humiliation the younger surgeon had been under. They were kind like that.

              And so Mario focused his mind on what he could remember. The memories he had left of the two people he saw as his friends, and smiled at the moments he had forgotten.


End file.
